Tuesday, May 18, 2010



It's been five months already.

I went to Chicago. The last time I was there I was in my 2nd trimester with you, so the whole visit was tinged with little memories of what all we had done with you there. I had a really good time with A & M though. They were really good to me, even when I was grumpy and sad. You would have liked them - M would make you laugh, and A would just love on you. I'm sad you have to miss out on that.

I went hoping to reflect on how to be a better person - a better wife, a better mom. If we get to have a little brother or sister for you, I want to be as healthy a person as I can be. I know your Dad wants that for himself too. So, I thought a lot about everything. Losing you knocked us off the path a little bit - which isn't your fault. We just were so excited to have you and never even let it enter our minds that you could die. I think we're slowly getting on the right path to where we would like to be as individuals, and as partners.

Lyra, my dear, beautiful daughter - you are forever missed. 

Always loving you,


  1. I'm so sorry Lyra is not here.

  2. Beautiful, heartfelt letter to Lyra. Thanks for sharing... Wish she could be right there with you...

  3. Rachel- you've been on my mind so much. I'm glad your feeling like your back on the path. What a beautiful letter to sweet Lyra. Happy 5 month birthday baby girl.

  4. Such a sweet letter to Lyra! xo

  5. A lovely letter. XO thinking of you & Lyra.

  6. Praying for you as you journey back to the path you desire to be on. Thank you for sharing this very touching letter to Lyra.

  7. How generous of you to share this lovely letter to Lyra. Today's artwork is just lovely, such yummy purples and blues.

  8. My heart aches for you, sweet mama. ((hugs))
    And I so love to come here and feast my eyes on your art. So beautiful.