Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Random & 30 Days

To update:
I called to find out some more information about the sonogram...namely if this was the basic, "We have to tell you this to cover our all bases and you don't sue us." OR if it was that they saw something that literally made them concerned that Simon has d.s.
I got a call back from the nurse who was holding my sonogram report in front of her. She read off everything that I'd be able to understand...which was that there were no other abnormalities seen. Everything measured right on track with development, and the cysts were the only reasons they brought up d.s. This doesn't necessarily put us in the clear, but I do feel slightly better about the information I could get over the phone. I still have to wait for my appointment later this month, and will discuss what the doctor recommends, and what we are comfortable with. For now, we'll just pray and hope!  
Ok, is it lame that I'm jumping on this challenge now? I didn't think I was in enough of a mood to do it...or whatever. But I loved reading about everyone. And then I felt silly that I wasn't doing it, especially since October is Pregnancy Loss and Awareness month. So here it is, a few days  behind. See Angie's post for how it all came about.

Day 1 - a song that reminds you of your child, or one that you can't listen to anymore and why.
I took to Eisley's "Taking Control" as an anthem for getting through those first months. Sometimes I can't listen to it now, because it takes me right back to those intensely raw moments. 

Day 2 - a movie that helped you get through the hard times, or one that jumps out at you after your loss.

I wanted to watch anything that would be distracting. Our good friends are sweet enough to let us use their netflix account, so some of those early movies were: Robin Hood:Prince of Thieves, The Mighty Ducks, Center Stage, Bridget Jones's Diary, Brokeback Mountain, The Producers... None of those are my favorite, or really speak to me. Just pure entertainment.

Day 3 - a television program that helped you either get through hard times or that moves you.

I watched all available seasons of Weeds, Bones and Friday Night Lights. 
Weeds was nice and distracting.
Bones is a favorite of ours - I'd get mad at L if he watched an episode without me :)
Friday Night Lights is nostalgic since we both grew up in rural towns. Sure, we knock country bumpkins, but you have to love when the weather cools, and everyone gathers at the football field to literally watch the game, or to just socialize. There's something about small town life that we miss, and would want to maybe someday give our family a taste of.

Day 4 - your favorite book. has it changed since your loss?
Pre-Lyra: my favorite book was "Persuasion" by Jane Austen. Go ahead, roll your eyes. I know Austen is seen as a cop out. But I love the classics, and I love reading. I sometimes struggled to know what modern books to read, so the classics were always there for me.
Post-Lyra: I actually got a book from a friend right after Lyra died - "Dress Your Family in Corduroy & Denim" by David Sedaris. I can't find the note right now, but she mentioned something about how even during the hard times we need deep belly laughs...even for a few moments. I loved it. I promptly checked out any others I could find from the library.
Also, have to give a shout out to Elizabeth McCracken's "An Exact Replica of a Figment of my Imagination". I bought two to share with others, and one for myself.

Day 5 - your favorite quote.

Um. I don't know that I had one? Probably something by Wendell Berry or J.Austen or some artist somewhere. My friend has a quote book, where she writes her favorite quotes; I think my brain is powerful enough to remember quotes, and they all get lost and mixed up.

Day 6 - twenty things that calm you.

1. Blankets - snuggling, nesting, wrapping up.
2. Naps
3. Getting mail from friends
4. Watching the stars
5. Being surrounded by books
6. Painting
7. Watching a movie
8. Drinking chai or other teas
9. Sitting on or near heat sources (obviously only in winter)
10. Being on the beach
11. Playing with kitties
12. Eating outside on a blanket
13. Watching wheat blow in the wind
14. Rain or snow and no need to be anywhere
15. Candles
16. Being out on a farm
17. Coffee shops
18. A back rub
19. A good camp fire
20. Watching storms roll in 

You can look forward to answers to these in the coming days:
Day 7 - a photo that makes you happy.
Day 8 - a photo that makes you angry/sad.
Day 9 - a photo you took since your loss.
Day 10 - a photo taken over 10 years ago of you and how it makes you feel seeing it now.
Day 11 - a photo of you recently and how it makes you feel seeing it now.
Day 12 - something you are OCD about.
Day 13 - a fictional book that is meaningful to you since your loss.
Day 14 - a non-fictional book that is meaningful to you since your loss.
Day 15 - what you like about your house.
Day 16 - a song that makes you cry (or nearly).
Day 17 - an art piece (drawing, sculpture, painting, etc) that moves you.
Day 18 - my wedding/future wedding/past wedding.
Day 19 - a talent of yours.
Day 20 - a hobby of yours and how it changed since your loss.
Day 21 - a recipe.
Day 22 - a website that has been meaningful since your loss.
Day 23 - a youtube video that makes you laugh.
Day 24 - where you live
Day 25 - your day, in great detail
Day 26 - your week, in great detail
Day 27 - your worst habit since your child's death.
Day 28 - what's in your handbag/purse
Day 29 - hopes, dreams, and plans for the next 365 days
Day 30 - a dream for the future 


  1. I am so glad you joined in! It's fun to see what we all have in common (besides the obvious!) and also what we can learn from one another.


  2. good for you!

    I just know me though and as much as I think I may like to do this, it really just exhuasts me to think about it. I'll continue to read about everyone one else for now.

  3. I am having fun doing this--it's helping keep my mind off more immediate challenges :) I am in the middle of watching "Weeds" on Netflix--well, maybe middle is overzealous. I'm on Season 2. But I like it!

    Also, that David Sedaris book is one of my favorites of his. It is freaking hilarious. Only funnier is hearing him read his writing aloud. Tears.

    Glad you got a little peace from your phone call--will continue to keep you guys in my thoughts :)

  4. Love learning more about you...I also love Friday Night Lights, such a great show! I have been wanting to read a David Sedaris book, my friend had told me how funny he is, maybe I'll have to start with that one.

  5. Glad you joined in! I'll look forward to the rest of your answers. Always thinking of you. XO

  6. I love David Sedaris, but I must say he is best enjoyed as an audio book (unedited of course) that you could get at the library (or interlibrary loaned- I know our library has the book your friend gave you on cd). He has also been a guest author/reader on "This American Life" many times (my favorite media - as you've likely guessed- radio documentary) Thanks for sharing!

  7. I love this! Not lame at all to start late, silly goose. And your 20 things that calm was wonderful.