Tuesday, February 23, 2010



Today H is supposed to be born.

We're going to try and see him. It's going to be really hard, because it's not easy being reminded of how we don't get to have you here with us. His parents are ok if we cry though. And we will cry.

They were looking forward to you too. They wanted us to join in parenthood when they had their little girl. But we weren't ready. But this last year we were, it was going to be perfect. And we ended up with due dates so close together. We could get together, and all three kids could play, and us adults could watch and hang out. They would give us advice when we needed it, and it would be great. It just ended a little different than we thought.

They have been so good to us. They came to your burial. They cried with us. And they still do. And that's why we need to see H. If it were anyone else, I wouldn't even consider it. I couldn't hold it together. But they don't expect us to hold it together. They loved you. And we love them. So we're going.

I'm missing you like crazy little girl. You're always in my thoughts.

Loving you always,


  1. Lots of hugs and thinking of you today.

  2. hey Rachel

    I'm sending you a big, big hug. You're in my thoughts today, Wednesday the 24th, Lyra's due date. 1 year, 20 months to the day since we found out our little boy's heart had stopped beating.

    Much love to you

    xxxoo Ines