I sometimes wonder when this depressed funk will dissolve into something more philosophical and wise. I feel like I'm just whining and sad. I know I've said this in a conversation with another babylost mama, but if I'm repeating myself here, forgive me. I'm not hopeless, but I'm not overly hopeful either. At least not hopeful on the "getting over it" front. I don't see how it's possible to feel less pain when every day/event/holiday/family reunion/homecoming is another thing my daughter won't get to be a part of. I know it will change and be a different sort of pain - or at least that's what I'm told. I mentioned to my husband last night, "I'm sure this will get tiring, but how can I ignore the things that she would have been a part of?" I'm lucky enough to have married such a wonderful man, because he just reassured me and said we shouldn't forget those things. It's impossible to.
We are probably going to the town her grave is in after church. We'll leave some flowers and enjoy the nice weather.
So happy Easter to all of you out there. I have a question for you: What songs/artists are on your repeat list? They don't have to necessarily pertain to babyloss. The artists I'm listening to for my mood lately have been: Joanna Newsom, Eisley, and Sufjan Stevens.